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How to Make $75 Grand

 A little old lady walked into the head branch of the Chase Manhattan Bank
holding a large paper bag in her hand. She told the young man at the window
that she wished to deposit the $3 million she had in the bag and open an
account with the bank. She said that first, though, she wished to meet the
president of Chase Manhattan Bank due to the large amount of money involved.
The teller seemed to think that this was a reasonable request, and after
opening the paper bag and seeing bundles of $1,000 bills which amounted to
about $3 million, telephoned the bank president's secretary to obtain an
appointment for the lady.

 The lady was escorted upstairs and ushered into the presidents office.
Introductions were made and she stated that she liked to get to know the
people she did business with on a more personal level. The bank president
then asked her how she came into such a large sum of money. "Was it an
inheritance?", he asked.

 "No,"she replied. He was quiet for a minute, trying to think where this
little old lady could possibly have come into $3 million.

 "I bet", she stated.

 "You bet?", repeated the bank president. "As in horses?"

 "No", she replied. "I bet on people". Seeing his confusion, she explained
that she just bet different things with people. All of a sudden she said
"I'll bet you $25,000 that by 10:00 tomorrow morning your balls will be

 The bank president figured that she must be off her rocker and decided to
take her up on the bet. He didn't see how he could lose. For the rest of
the day, the bank president was very careful. He decided to stay home that
evening and take no chances - there was $25,000 at stake.

 When he got up in the morning and took his shower, he checked to make
sure that everything was OK. There was no difference. He looked the same
as he always had. He went to work and waited for the little old lady to
come in at 10:00, humming as he went. He knew that this would be a good
day - how often do you get handed $25,000 for doing nothing?

 At 10:00 sharp the little old lady was shown into his office. With her
was a younger man. When asked the man's purpose for being there, she
informed him that he was her lawyer and that she always took him along
whenever there was this much money involved. "Well", she asked, "What
about our bet?"

 "I don't know how to tell you this", he replied, "but I'm the same as
I've always been, only $25,000 richer!"

 The lady seemed to accept this, but requested that she be able to see for
herself. The bank president thought that this was reasonable and dropped
his trousers. She instructed him to bend over and then she grabbed hold of
him. Sure enough, everything was fine. The bank president then looked up
and saw her lawyer standing across the room banging his head against the

 "What's wrong with him?", he asked.

 "Oh, him", she replied. "I bet him $100,000 that by 10:00 this morning
I'd have the president of the Chase Manhattan Bank by the balls."
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