netjeff.com Humor collection Rejection Lines Given By Men & Women (and what they actually mean...)

The female perspective

I think of you as a brother. 
(You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.")

There's a slight difference in our ages. 
(You are one jurassic geezer.)

I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. 
(You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes upon.)

My life is too complicated right now. 
(I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may hear phone 
 calls from all the other guys I'm seeing.)

I've got a boyfriend 
(who's really my male cat and a half gallon of Ben and Jerry's).

I don't date men where I work. 
(Hey, bud, I wouldn't even date you if  you were in the same
 'solar system', much less the same building.)

It's not you, it's me. 
(It's not me, it's you.)

I'm concentrating on my career. 
(Even something as boring and unfulfilling as my job is better 
 than dating you.)

I'm celibate. 
(I've sworn off only the men like you.)

Let's be friends. 
(I want you to stay around so I can tell you in excruciating 
 detail about all the other men I meet and have sex with.  It's 
 that male perspective thing.)

_______________________________________________________________________


The male perspective 

I think of you as a sister. 
(You're ugly.)

There's a slight difference in our ages. 
(You're ugly.)

I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way. 
(You're ugly.)

My life is too complicated right now. 
(You're ugly.)

I've got a girlfriend. 
(You're ugly.)

I don't date women where I work. 
(You're ugly.)

It's not you, it's me. 
(You're ugly.)

I'm concentrating on my career. 
(You're ugly.)

I'm celibate. 
(You're ugly.)

Let's be friends. 
(You're sinfully ugly.)

netjeff.com Humor collection Rejection Lines Given By Men & Women (and what they actually mean...)