netjeff.com Humor collection Proper care of floppies

I used to be a consultant at SUNYA and one person came to me with this
problem.  They couldn't get the disks (plural) out of the drive
(singular).  Sure enough, there were two disks in the drive. 
Apparently, they were trying to copy the disks...

						Jules
----------
From: Kyle Wohlmut  (netmail!kyle(at)CSLI.Stanford.EDU)

] Please circulate this as broadly as possible to the user community.   
This
] is important information that everybody can use.
]
]                         PROPER CARE OF FLOPPIES
]
]  1.  Never leave diskettes in the disk drive, as data can leak out of
]      the disk and corrode the inner mechanics of the drive.  Diskettes
]      should be rolled up and stored in pencil holders.
]
]  2.  Diskettes should be cleaned and waxed once a week.  Microscopic
]      metal particles can be removed by waving a powerful magnet over
]      the surface of the disk.  Any stubborn metallic shavings can be
]      removed with scouring powder and soap.  When waxing the
]      diskettes, make sure the surface is even.  This will allow the
]      diskette to spin faster, resulting in better access time.
]
]  3.  Do not fold diskettes unless they do not fit into the drive.
]      "Big" diskettes may be folded and used in "little" disk drives.
]
]  4.  Never insert a diskette into the drive upside down.  The data can
]      fall off the surface of the disk and jam the intricate mechanics
]      of the drive.
]
]  5.  Diskettes cannot be backed up by running them through the xerox
]      machine.  If your data is going to need to be backed up, simply
]      insert two diskettes into the drive.  Whenever you update a
]      document, the data will be written on both diskettes.
]
]  6.  Diskettes should not be inserted or removed from the drive while
]      the red light is flashing.  Doing so could result in smeared or
]      possibly unreadable text.  Occasionally the red light remains
]      flashing in what is known as a "hung" or "hooked" state.  If your
]      system is "hooking" you will probably need to insert a few coins
]      before being allowed access to the slot.
]
]  7.  If your diskette is full and you need more storage space, remove
]      the disk from the drive and shake vigorously for 2 minutes.  This
]      will pack the data enough (Data Compression) to allow for more
]      storage.  Be sure to cover all the openings with scotch tape to
]      prevent loss data.
]
]  8.  Data access time can be greatly improved by cutting more holes in
]      the diskette jacket.  This will provide more simultaneous access
]      points to the disk.
]
]  9.  Diskettes may be used as coasters for beverage glasses, provided
]      that they are properly waxed beforehand.  Be sure to wipe the
]      diskettes dry before using.  (see item 2 above)
]
]  10. Never use scissors and glue to manually edit documents.  The data
]      is stored much too small for the naked eye, and you may end up
]      with data from some other document stuck in the middle of your
]      document.  Razor blades and scotch tape may be used, however,
]      provided the user is equipped with an electron microscope.
]
]  11. Periodically spray diskettes with insecticide to prevent system
]      bugs from spreading.

netjeff.com Humor collection Proper care of floppies