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The Perfect Day According to.....
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HER PERFECT DAY
08:15 Wakeup to hugs and kisses
08:30 Weigh in 5lbs lighter than yesterday
08:45 Breakfast in bed, fresh squeezed orange juice and croissants
09:15 Soothing hot bath with fragrant lilac bath oil
10:00 Light workout at club with handsome, funny, personal trainer
10:30 Facial, manicure, shampoo and comb out
12:00 Lunch with best friend at outdoor cafe
12:45 Notice ex-boyfriends wife, she has gained 30lbs
01:00 Shopping with friends, unlimited credit
02:30 Run into boyfriend's ex, notice she's gained thirty pounds
03:00 Nap
04:00 3 dozen roses delivered by florist, card is from secret admirer
04:15 Light workout at club, followed by gentle massage
05:30 Pick out outfit for dinner, primp before the mirror
07:30 Candlelight dinner for two followed by dancing
10:00 Hot shower (alone)
10:30 Make love
11:00 Pillow talk, light touching and cuddling
11:15 Fall asleep in his big strong arms
HIS PERFECT DAY
06:00 Alarm
06:15 Blowjob
06:30 Massive dump while reading sports magazine
07:00 Breakfast, Filet mignon and eggs, toast and coffee
07:30 Limo arrives
07:45 Bloody Mary enroute to airport
08:15 Private G4 learjet to Cape Town
09:30 Limo to Golf Club
09:45 Front nine (2 under)
11:45 Lunch, 2 dozen oysters on the half shell, 3 Heinekens
12:15 Blowjob
12:30 Back nine (4 under)
02:15 Limo back to airport (Bombay martini)
02:30 Private G4, CT to Mauritius (nap)
03:15 Late afternoon fishing excursion with all female (naked)crew
04:30 Land world-record, light-tackle Marlin (1249lbs)
05:00 G4 back to CT massage & hand job enroute by naked Sharon Stone
06:45 Shit, shower and shave
07:30 Dinner, Lobster appetizers, Dom Perigon(1963), 20 oz.Steak
09:00 Remy Martin and Cuban Partagas cigar
09:30 Sex with three women
11:00 Massage and Jacuzzi
11:45 Bed (alone)
11:50 12 second, 4 octave fart, dog leaves the room
11:55 Giggle yourself to sleep
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