-> Humor collection -> Microsoft trademarks the name 'Bob'

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Microsoft trademarks the name 'Bob'

REDMOND, Washington--January 4, 1995--In response to customer inquiries,
Microsoft today clarified the naming policy for Bob(tm), its new software
product designed for computer beginners.  Contrary to rumors, Microsoft will
not demand that all persons formerly named "Bob" immediately select new
first names.
    "I don't know where these rumors come from," commented Steve Balmer,
Microsoft Executive Vice President for Worldwide Sales and Support.  "It's
ridiculous to think Microsoft would force people outside the computer
industry to change their names.  We won't, and our licensing policies for
people within the industry will be so reasonable that the Justice Department
could never question them."
    Balmer said employees of other computer companies will be given the
opportunity to select new names, and will also be offered a licensing option
allowing them to continue using their former names at very low cost.
    The new licensing program, called Microsoft TrueName(tm), offers
persons who want to continue being known by the name Bob the option of
doing so, with the payment of a small monthly licensing fee and upon signing
a release form promising never to use OpenDoc.  As an added bonus, Bob name
licensees will also be authorized to display the Windows 95 logo on their
    Persons choosing not to license the Bob name will be given a 60-day
grace period during which they can select another related name.  "We're
being very lenient in our enforcement of the Bob trademark," said Bill
Newkom, Microsoft's Senior Vice President of Law and Corporate Affairs. 
"People are still free to call themselves Robert, Robby, or even Rob.  Bobby
however is derivative of Microsoft's trademark and obviously can't be
    Microsoft also announced today that Bob(tm) Harbold, its Executive Vice
President and Chief Operating Officer, has become the first Microsoft
TrueName licensee and will have the Windows 95 logo tattooed to his
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