netjeff.com Humor collection The Rules For Bedroom Golf

1.  Each player shall furnish his own equipment for play: normally
    one club and two balls.

2.  Play on a course must be approved by the owner of the hole.

3.  Unlike outdoor golf, the object of the game is to get the club in
    the hole, keeping the balls out.

4.  For the most effective play, the club should have a firm shaft.
    Course owners are permitted to check the stiffness before play.

5.  Course owners reserve the right to restrict the length of the
    club to avoid damage to the hole.

6.  The object of the game is to take as many strokes as necessary
    until the course owner is satisfied the play is complete.  Failure
    to do so may result in being denied permission to play the course
    again.

7.  It is considered bad form to begin playing the hole immediately
    upon arrival at the course.  The experienced player will normally
    take time to admire the entire course, with special attention to
    well formed bunkers.

8.  Players are cautioned not to mention other courses they have
    played, or are currently playing, to the owner of the course
    being played.  Upset course owners have been known to damage
    a player's equipment for this reason.

9.  Players are encouraged to bring rain gear along, just in case.

10. Players should not assume a course is in shape for play at all
    times.  Some players may be embarrased if they find the course
    to be temporarily under repair.  Players are advised to be
    extremely tackful in this situation.  More advanced players will
    find alternative means of play when this is the case.

    NB  Unfortunately rule twelve has been censored as most of
        our golf players are golden oldies.  We do not want to
        Loose them through heart attacks.

13. Slow play is encouraged.  However, players should proceed at a
    quicker pace, at least temporarily, at the course owner's
    request of it, when it is about to start raining.

14. It is considered an outstanding performance, time permitting, to
    play the same hole several times in one match.

15. The course owner will be the sole judge of who is the best
    Player.

16. Players are advised to think twice before considering membership
    at a given course.  Additional assesments may be levied by the
    course owner and the rules are subject to change.  For this
    reason, many players prefer to continue to play at a variety of
    different courses.

netjeff.com Humor collection The Rules For Bedroom Golf