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Babylon 5 Meets Star Trek: The Next Generation
By dboulter(at)

Sorry about this, folks, but I got caught up in the B-5 vs ST
thread and this was the only way I knew to escape!!

Location: A room.  Lighting: Low.  Door Chimes sound.

Bester:  Enter.
A man enters and smiles a familiar smarmy smile.
Bester:  Who are you?
Morden:  What do you want?
Bester:  What do you mean?
Morden:  What do you want?
Bester looks at him intently then smiles a shiver-down-the-back
producing smile.

Tech 1:  Commander, there's something coming through the jump gate.
Ivanova: Is there anything scheduled?
Tech 1: No, Commander.
Ivanova:  What the hell?  Ivanova to Sheridan, come to C&C immediately.
Tech 1:  What is it?
Ivanova:  Damned if I know.  It has some sort of writing on it, though,
          NCC1701-F.  Any Idea what that means?

Picard: Commander LaForge, report.  What happened?
LaForge: I don't know Captain.  Best I can say is we went through
         some sort of portal.
Riker:  We need more than that Jordi.
LaForge: I'm  on it. You have to give me some time, Commander.
Riker:  We only have one hour, you know that, LaForge.
LaForge: Aye, sir. 
Picard (looking at B-5 on view screen): What do you make of it No.1?
Riker: It's rotating, so they don't seem to have artificial gravity.
       They can't be too advanced a civilization.  Data, what are you 
       picking up on sensors.
Data:  It is a space station, sir.  Sensors show 252,142 life forms -
       most of them human, sir.
Picard:  Human?  Hail them, Mr. Worf.
Worf:  Aye, sir.  Suggest we go to yellow alert, Captain.
Picard: Yellow alert?  Why is that?
Worf:  I don't know, sir, it's what I always say.
      They are answering our hail, sir.
Picard: On screen.

Sheridan:  This is Captain John Sheridan of Earth Alliance Station
           Babylon-5.  How may we help you?
Picard:  I am Jean-Luc Picard of the Federation Starship Enterprise.
         Did you say 'Earth Alliance'?
Sheridan: Yes I did.
Picard:  This may sound strange to you, but what is the Star Date?
Sheridan: Star Date?  This is 2259, the year the great war came upon
          us all.
Picard motions to Worf to cut the audio.
Picard:  Well, what do you make of it.
Data:  We appear to have crossed over into a parallel universe.
       However, our crossover seems to have produced a time shift as well.
Troi:  Captain?
Picard: Yes, Deanna?
Troi:  Captain, I am sensing a great deal of dislike for us in this
       Universe.  I think we should get out of it quickly.
Worf:  Another ship is coming through to normal space.  Suggest we
      raise shields.  You heard what he said about a great war, sir?
Picard:  Very well Mr. Worf, Raise shields.
Worf: Shields will not raise, Captain.
LaForge:  I'm working on it, Captain.


Ivanova:  Did you see them, Captain, they all appear to be wearing
Sheridan: Yes, and they appear to be human as well - at least most
          of them.  Rather impolite of them to turn their backs on
          us in the middle of a conversation, don't you think.  Now what
          was that he said about a Federation?  It seems to ring a bell.
          Get Garibaldi up here right away!  I seem to recall that he
          watches old videos and there's something just not right about
Tech 1:  Something coming through the jump gate.  It's Earth Alliance.
         A Psi-Corps officer wishes to talk to you, Captain.
Sheridan: Put him on.
Bester:  Good Day, Captain Sheridan.  
Sheridan:  Mister Bester.  What can we do for you?
Bester:  We have received word of a rogue telepath.  She is on that
         ship.  We want her.


Turbo lift opens as Enterprise crew watch exchange between B5 and

Scott:  I canna believe it.  It's Chekov.
Picard:  What are you doing here Captain Scott.
Scott:  Call me Scotty.  I dinna ken, but I've been on every other
        Enterprise.  Probably something to do with the ratings, laddie.
        What's Chekov doing there?
Picard:  Who's Chekov?
Scott:  I used to work with him on the Original Enterprise.  He hardly
        seems to have aged a day.
Picard:  Computer:  Bring up the file on Federation Officer Chekov.
Computer:  By your command!
Riker:  LaForge!
LaForge:  I'm working on it, sir.
Troi:  We really should get out of here.  We are not liked in this
       Universe.  Really not liked.  And I don't want to go with that man.
       He seems to feel that I shouldn't pop in and out of peoples minds.
       Let's go.  Now!
LaForge:  I'm not sure we can.  I've found the problem.  None of our 
     technobabble devices work here.
Picard:  What are you saying?
Data:  What the Commander is saying, is that techobabble will not work
       in this Universe, Captain.  We are stuck with obeying the laws
       of Physics.  Only 58.5% of our ships' systems will work here.
Picard:  Good God!
Riker:  How about a particle of the week?  Can that get us out?
Data:  No sir.  And it gets worse.
Picard:  Worse?
LaForge:  What Data is trying to say, sirs, is that in this Universe
          there is continuity and . . .
All:  Continuity?!
Data:  And character growth and development
All (in horror): Character growth and development?!
Picard:  Set course, warp factor 9, Engage.  We have to get back to
         our own universe, this Babylon-5 universe is beyond us.
Riker:  It's not working and that man Bester is approaching.  He's grinning.
Troi:  Maybe if I apologized to everyone who's mind I've invaded???
LaForge:  We're stuck here, Captain - there's no getting away from them.
          We're stuck in a universe with Babylon-5!
Picard:  Curse you, Straczynski!

Once again my most insincere apologies.  Now that you know what would
happen, can we get off the Enterprise vs B5 merry-go-round?
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