-> Humor collection -> What Developers say vs what they mean

Ad: netjeff recommends rShopping app for Android, for your shopping list needs.

What Developers say vs what they mean

 What Developers say                What Developers mean
 -------------------                --------------------

1) Essentially complete             It's half done

2) Schedule exposure                It slipped three weeks ago

3) We predict                       We hope to God

4) Screen design is lagging         Not a single screen exists

5) Risk is high but acceptable      100 to 1 odds; or, with 10 times
                                    the budget and 10 times the
                                    people, we stand a 50/50 chance

6) Potential show stopper           The team has updated their resumes

7) Serious but not insurmountable   It'll take a miracle

8) Basic agreement has been         The &%$#@'s won't even talk to us

9) Results are being quantified     We're massaging the numbers so
                                    that they will agree with our

10) Task force to review            7 people who are incompetent at
                                    their regular jobs have been
                                    loaned to the project

11) Not well defined                Nobody's even thought about it

12) Still scoping the requirements  See answer to number 11.

13) Not well understood             Now that we've thought about it,
                                    we don't want to think about it

14) Requires further analysis       Totally out of control
    and management attention

15) Results are encouraging         Power-on produced no smoke
Categories for this item: Programming, Computers -> Humor collection -> What Developers say vs what they mean